1. Anxiety: Michael has to have an endoscopy done at TMH in the morning. I know this a routine procedure but sadly I also know how often a "routine" procedure can go drastically wrong. You know the saying "ignorance is bliss"? Well sometimes it is.... BUT... My Dad came over tonight and gave Michael a blessing. Now I just need to have faith that everything will be ok.
2. Sadness: I know a TON of people that have had C-sections lately. ALL of them have been able to successfully breastfeed. With each story of success I hear I am VERY happy for them. But it makes me very sad and I start questioning myself. Why wasn't I able to do it? I know I gave it a great shot. I know I exhausted all options before giving up. But why did it happen that way? The whole story of what went on is in a previous blog but here is the abbreviated version. {Had C-section, 6 days later baby was screaming non-stop and had dropped from 7lbs 7oz to 6lbs 3oz. Went to breastfeeding support group. Learned that babygirl was only getting about a teaspoon of milk with each feeding. Learned that my milk had failed to come in correctly. Had to supplement with formula. Went on a ton of supplements/meds and started aggressively pumping and nursing. My milk STILL didn't come in. I finally gave up when Makenna was 8 weeks old.} So I Know I need to count my blessings, and I am totally happy for everyone that can breastfeed.
3. Frustration: WHY WAS I SO STUPID?????? I lollygagged in school and should have had my nursing degree totally done. Now I'm having to figure out a way for me to finish it up, and Michael needs to finish up also. AND... Why didn't we save more money when we were childless and had so much? Oh well... you live and you learn...
4. Love: Every time I think that I couldn't possibly love Michael and Makenna more, something happens that proves me wrong! I am so so SO blessed to have such an amazing man for a husband, and such a perfect little baby girl as a daughter!
5. Wonder: I wonder how on earth 4 months have gone by so fast!! I wonder how Makenna has grown so much in such a short amount of time. I wonder if I will ever get a full night's rest again (having Makenna is TOTALLY worth the lost sleep.).
6. Joy: These have been the best 4 months of my life. I love my little family so much. We have grown so much together. The following pictures will totally explain my joy!
Makenna and Rylie in the bath
Makenna and Bapa
Bath time fun!
Birthing class reunion!
Baby girl watching General Conference and "studying" the scriptures.
Birthing Class Daddies
Baby girl after daddy dressed her... florescent orange stripes on shirt, pink pants with red polka dots...
Makenna and Daddy...
Makenna and Raelee.
Go Noles!!!
Me and my baby!
Baby, Puppy, and Piano... What could be cuter?
Hanging out with Daddy
Raelee pushing Makenna in babydoll stroller
Poor baby girl not feeling good after her 4 month shots.
Happy Girl!
4 Month Stats! Notice the scribbled out portion. The nurse had mistakenly charted Makenna on the 6th month line. This put her in the 6th% for height and 30th% for weight and head circumference. Being in the right month REALLY makes a difference!
No comments:
Post a Comment